Good Boy

At first sight, the Good Boy trend seems harmless. Young people say things to each other like "pass me that", "bring that here" or "hold this for a sec", after which the person who does it gets a response such as "good boy," said in a way that recalls how someone praises their dog. It is often meant as a joke between friends, a kind of playful power relationship with a wink.

Yet that light tone can quickly turn. Increasingly, videos appear in which one person takes on the role of 'baasje' (owner/master) and gives others orders, sometimes of a humiliating or bullying nature. These images are then shared on social media, often without the consent of the person on camera. What started as humour can thus grow into online humiliation or group pressure.

The trend touches on recognisable needs and group dynamics:

• Attention and status: whoever makes a funny or sharp video gets likes and followers.
• Group bonding: taking part strengthens the feeling of belonging.
• Playful hierarchy: young people experiment with power, role division and humour.
• Normalisation of bullying: humiliation is packaged as a joke, blurring boundaries.

For young people in a weaker social position, taking part may no longer be a choice, but something they do so as not to be excluded from the group.

• Platform logic: short, recognisable and funny videos get a lot of reach, which drives the trend.
• Social pressure: nobody wants to be the one who "doesn't get the joke".
• Concealment through humour: "it's just a joke" is used to justify hurtful behaviour.
• Shift in power: who films and who reacts determines who has power and who feels small.

• Young people being ridiculed in videos under the guise of humour.
• Recordings in which someone is given orders and then called "good boy" or "good girl".
• Young people who withdraw, feel ashamed or suddenly become less active online.
• Conversations or jokes in which inequality or dominance is normalised.

• Recognise the boundary: a joke is not always harmless; it can belittle or exclude someone.
• Normalise conversations about respect: talk about consent and about how humour can sometimes hurt.
• Increase resilience: help young people put into words what makes them uncomfortable.
• Make group agreements: in classes, sports teams and youth centres about filming, posting and respect.
• Work together: involve parents, schools and youth workers in identifying online behaviour.
• Encourage positive humour: make room for creative content that connects rather than harms.

In a group
- "What do you find funny about videos like this?"
- "When does something funny actually become bullying?"
- "What does it do to someone when people laugh at them?"

One-to-one
- "Have you seen videos like this or experienced it yourself?"
- "How did that feel: funny, awkward, something in between?"
- "What do people actually mean when they say 'good boy'? How does it come across?"

Keep the tone light but engaged. Young people often understand themselves that something is off, but do not feel free to say so. By talking about intention and effect, behaviour becomes open to discussion without judging.

• TrendSein – GoodBoy: De grens tussen grap en vernedering (TrendSein newsletter, Trendsein - Goodboy.pdf, p. 1–5)